Lugubrious Whinging

Feeling a wave of tristesse with no loci, just this heavy-rain feeling. It’s probably the normal cycle, the spiral falling on itself in the west, or north (direction doesn’t matter; illustrative purposes only). If there’s one thing anyone should know about me, I get into these deep blue spots more often than most and, while you might expect balance, you’d be disappointed if you thought that — usually the cycle rotates between grey, deep blue and black. There are rarely rainbows in my world. I paint in shades of blue and grey, with black for contrast.

I miss sleep, that comfy slumber verging on being too warm, but not quite eclipsing that division between comfort and too hot. I sleep, but it is a restless sleep with periods of wakefulness. But now I know too much, seen too much to seem to be able to pull that comfort over me like a flannel blanket and just slumber as the day changes to night and you know you’ve been abed too long, but you don’t want to move, to break the spell, and so you just slumber some more. Though not a requirement, someone to slumber with is always welcome.

Games. I’m about 20 hrs into Cyberpunk 2077 (PC edition). I play slow and enjoy my games. It’s fun, but not fantastically so — doesn’t live up to the original hype, unfortunately. I won’t probably play it multiple times like each of the Witcher games by CDPR, which is too bad. They overreached, either in game scope or the number of platforms they tried to develop for. As a result, the core game suffered. CDPR will fix — they are good about that, but I don’t know they can fix some quality of life and core game things. I hate the maps and the menu navigation. I get what they are trying to do, but the menu designer should be shot. The quests/missions are so far bog-standard fare, but at least each has their own color. The method for tracking the missions is terrible (again, menu design). The main story is intriguing and so far decent, but there won’t be any awards for the story arc. I know I’m not selling the game, because I can’t. It was worth the scratch I laid out for it, but nothing earth-shattering. In ways, Valhalla does a better job — which is not something I ever expected to say.

Politics. It seems there is still some fantasy about who won in some circles, which is just weird. But there is only one last place things could really go hinky, and I hope that it is only a fantasy of my own that anyone will try to leverage what is patently wrong to make a wronger thing happen. This has been one of those four-year nightmares where you think you’ve woken only to find out that your nightmare is still going on.

Work. Time to argue about things with people who want to make apples appear as oranges because it suits their motivations to do so. More fantasy to dispel. Yay.

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