on the wind
geese shit on the lawn

Minnesota doesn’t really have four seasons.

We have summer where it is hot and humid as hell (all those lakes probably play a role in the humidity) for about three months. Maybe 85-90ºF (~32ºC) doesn’t seem all that hot, but you probably don’t live somewhere with an average of 68% humidity, which effectively feels like 103ºF. In more arid climates, the temperature feels like what it says on the thermometer.

We also have winter, where it is not uncommon for the thermometer to fail to get above freezing for as many as three months. The rest of the time in our winters, it hovers around that temperature. As Prince (the musician for which Minneapolis is famous) said (paraphrased): He liked Minnesota because the weather kept out the riffraff. And, it’s largely true, though you wouldn’t believe it since Memorial Day, based on the news.

What about Spring? Autumn? Well, there’s a transition period between the extremes lasting about two weeks each that I suppose qualify as those seasons. But blink, and they are gone. And during that time, geese flying one direction or the other deposit enormous amounts of shit on any place that is green and looks like grass. Often, they aren’t above taking a dump in the street, on sidewalks, or on cars. So, that’s how I mark the two non-existent seasons — after-winter goose shit and after-summer goose shit.

In spite of the geese, I suppose that is why my favorite seasons are spring and autumn — the rarity of each makes each a joy to experience for the day or two we have them.

Anyway, we went from 90ºF to 45ºF overnight last week and I hear geese flying overhead since. Before going out, all I’m saying is that I take a moment to look up. It’s safer that way.

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